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Decide who will win each fight!
Toby vs. Ryan (suggested by someone from imdb)
Toby vs. Michael
Michael vs. Josh
Jan vs. Pam
Pam vs. Angela
Phyliss vs. Angela ("I don't like you!")
Kelly vs. Pam
Pam vs. girl from Stamford
Andy vs. Big Tuna
Dwight vs. Andy
Ryan vs. Jim
Toby vs. Jim
Todd Packer vs. Toby or Ryan or Kevin
Pam vs Angela? Angela, definately. And I can think of a few guys who wouldn't mind watching it either.
Jan would beat Pam, easily.
Dwight would beat Andy--he's a farm boy AND martial artist, remember. (A capella singers aren't generally known for their toughness.)
Is theorizing about Roy v. Jim too close to our hearts?
Frankly, I can't see Pam winning a whole lot of fights, unless it's against Karen from Stamford. The fight naturally takes place once Jim starts paying attention to Karen and Pam can't handle it anymore. Preferably, the fight takes place in Dwight's dojo.
I'm adopting this thread. Decide who would win each fight, what form each fight would take, and why for both:
Mana Y Mano - garbagethrower vs. ferd farkle
The New Yorker(s) - jinx vs. brian
The Out-Of-Towners - Daoust vs. Mixed Berries
Boobs - Single Tear vs. BigTunaFishing
Also, if you have any other good ideas for fights, feel free to list away.
Let me at that no good Aussie bastard! I'll tear 'im limb from limb. I envision it would be an old fashioned battle, 2 rounds. One on top of Ayers Rock, the other atop the CN Tower. No holds barred. Aussie rules.
The tale of the tape says I am probably a foot taller and 50 pounds heavier than Brian. However, he can write circles around me, which is the only kind of fight we'll ever have. Also, he's from the city. So...winner: Brian.
Aw, it's no fun when you settle peaceably. Surely you could have put up some kind of fight, Jinx.
Interesting matchups, Anque. I would suggest DftF and KarenM in a vocabulary cage match. Unlike BTF, the future Jeopardy champ, I am all-too-often googling their words and phrases.
As for me and farkel:
Mud wrestling: ok I am a tall drink o water and spunky but unless I mesmerized him by my amazing femaleness (see there, Daoust?) there's no way I'd take him. Match: ferd.
Office Haiku: yeah right. I'll admit to a moment or two of inspiration here and there but seriously. Match: ferd.
Graphic design: this is the only area where things might end in a draw. ba-dum-pum. But seriously there too; I'm good, but from what I've seen he might be better.
This is becoming depressing, Anque. Thanks a lot for bringing it up.
Oh yeah, and I forgot to mention, Russel Crowe sucks, and Nicole Kidman sucks, and Silverchair sucks and that country singer sucks, and what the hell, I never really liked any movies Heath Ledger was in either. Furthermore, rugby is a game for sissies. And you guys got smoked in Gallipoli. Oh yeah, and Steve Irwin was kinda cool, but he named his daughter Bindi, so he's a gaytard too.
Mets (are really the only perfect entity in my universe, and on another note, the Braves really) suck!
Statements of fact can start fights? Weird. Spot on about the Braves, though.
For a perfect entity, they sure are going down with injuries pretty quick. And don't try your tricks with me, young man! I'm on to your game.
Daoust, man. Chill out. MB's probably still sleeping and you're beating him to death with a baseball bat.
Is he even still alive?
Mud wrestling: ok I am a tall drink o water and spunky but unless I mesmerized him by my amazing femaleness (see there, Daoust?) there's no way I'd take him. Match: ferd.
I'd have to disagree with you here. ferd seems like that extremely gentlemanly type. The kind that can make it seem like you won fairly when indeed he was already taken by your amazing femaleness beforehand and so decided to throw the match. Am I right, mr. farkel? And while your pride might smart from a win like that, I'm sure it would be fun all the same.
I am...saying a lot of things.
I would suggest DftF and KarenM in a vocabulary cage match.
Also, I love this idea.
I think I lose in vocab cage match.
I will take all comers in a snottiness battle royale, and also think I would probably win in a contest of treating other people like they're stupid.
I was just about to post the same thing. About losing, that is, and a snottiness battle. But I was going to use a different word.
No, you wouldn't, dumbass.
Once more, you have failed to grasp the nuances of my point.
and also think I would probably win in a contest of treating other people like they're stupid.
Amateur.
Boobs - Single Tear vs. BigTunaFishing
I don't wanna fight with ST. She just had a baby and it seems mean to fight a new mother with sensitive, lactating boobs.
I don't wanna fight with ST. She just had a baby and it seems mean to fight a new mother with sensitive, lactating boobs.
True. You would have an advantage. Although, depending on the time of day, hers would be hard as rocks so it could go either way.
Ahh...the classics. They never grow old, do they?
Begging for another "young punk calls the middle-aged guy old" joke, are we?