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Did you check your... butt? - We've all got them.
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Oct 7th 2008

Instead of focusing on physical differences, let's talk about what we all have in common. Butts.

Oct 7th 2008

Frankly, and I've never admitted this before, I like big butts and I cannot lie.

Oct 7th 2008 edited

I prefer the term dairyair. Even though I have no idea how it's supposed to look in print and am too lazy to go figure it out right now.

(eta: Nevermind. Something like derriere, right?)

Oct 7th 2008 edited

Derriere. Right

Oct 7th 2008

I like them too, but I also like If's & And's.

Oct 7th 2008

Everyone's got one, and there's one in every crowd.

Oct 7th 2008

Mine's broken - it's got a crack in it.

Oct 7th 2008

That joke never gets old, WF1. (No sarcasm.) How come you never hear, "Mine's broken- it's got a hole in it"? Or, "Mine's broken- I'm constipated."?

Oct 7th 2008

"Mine's broken- I'm constipated"

That is hilarious. I have never heard that before.

Also, Krusty the Klown's favorite porn magazine is called "Gigantic Asses."

Oct 7th 2008

Outstanding. That's like the magazine Dave Thomas reads in Arrested Development - Bumpaddle.

Oct 7th 2008

I'm waiting for someone to start the shoulderblade thread. Or, perhaps, the femur thread.

Oct 7th 2008

How did this thread title not already exist?

Oct 7th 2008

How did we go all these years without a bajingo thread?

Oct 7th 2008

How did we go all these years without a bajingo?

Speak for yourself.

Oct 7th 2008

I see. How long have you had a bajingo, CGB? And how did you get your insurance provider to cover the surgery?

Oct 7th 2008

I think he lets his wife keep it.

Oct 7th 2008

"Mine's broken- I'm constipated"

That is hilarious. I have never heard that before.

In our family we have a name for if you're constipated or having diarrhea or lactose intolerant, etc. We say we've got bar. We all know that means, my butt ain't right."

TMI?

Oct 9th 2008 edited

We say our butts are "broken" when we are having digestive issues like that. We don't like saying the c word or the rhea word.

Oct 9th 2008

Have you tried "the runs," "the trots," or "the Hershey squirts" instead, ST?

Oct 9th 2008

c word

crap?

Oct 9th 2008

"My butt won't stop making a fist"

-Hank Venture

Oct 9th 2008

"the Hershey squirts"

Wow. Ick.

My husband and I are anything but prude but when it comes to the role our butts play in the digestive process, we pretty much keep to ourselves about it. If we're sick, we'll say something funny like "my butt is broken" but that's about it. We also don't fart in front of each other (well, I just don't do it at all, ya know, because I'm a girl).

We do, however, discuss in great detail the defecating habits of our children. Not for fun. That sounded like we do it as a pasttime. It's just a parental job requirement, though.

Oct 9th 2008

My 10th wedding anniversary is 2 weeks from tomorrow. I dated my wife for a year before we got married. In that 11 years, I've only heard her fart once. She tried to play it off as a creaky stair.

Oct 9th 2008

In that 11 years, I've only heard her fart once.

Lots of SBDs huh?

Oct 9th 2008

(well, I just don't do it at all, ya know, because I'm a girl).

I really wish Markdown had an eye-rolling icon. :-)

We do, however, discuss in great detail the defecating habits of our children.

Another of the joys of parenthood on which I missed out.

Oct 9th 2008

Have you tried "the runs," "the trots," or "the Hershey squirts" instead, ST?

A friend of mine calls them "the scoots".

Oct 9th 2008

A friend's mom has severe IBS and so she'll sometimes have to GO...immediately...and when that happens she calls it a "grunny attack."

Oct 9th 2008

A little off the subject, but a friend of mine describes her hot flashes as "personal summers". I thought that was pretty cute. We can go back to poop talk now.

Oct 9th 2008

We can go back to poop talk now.

O Joy! O Rapture!

Oct 9th 2008

AMJ - actually they're silent AND odorless. She's quite unusual that way.

Another butt-related item regarding Mrs. WF1 - before we were together, she had never heard of "Number One" and "Number Two". Not even having helped raise her sister's two kids when they were babies, nor after attending public schools. I'd have thought she would've heard those terms somewhere along the way.

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